Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
