But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
