is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Randomize
