I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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