We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
