I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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