I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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