im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
