No, you can still breathe under the balls.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize