so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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