you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
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