So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Who died my cat blue again?
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
