my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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