4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Randomize
