Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
