hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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