We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
