I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Blood and glitter go together right?
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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