I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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