Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
