Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
