A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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