hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
