New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
