My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
