Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
