she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
