I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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