office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
