I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I understand Curling. That high.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
