yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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