why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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