I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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