I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
