I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
