Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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