Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
