Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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