I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
