i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
You pole danced in your parka.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
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