As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
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