u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Randomize
