He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
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