i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Sober January is a disaster.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
