he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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