so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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