careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
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