Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Randomize