quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Randomize
