there was a trapeze. enough said
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
