My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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